the little things i notice

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Sometimes I can’t watch you.
I lose every ability to hold my gaze
But my eyes misbehave
I cant seem to concentrate
I find myself denying my sense of sight
Just to not notice something new and fall in love with it.
I love you more when you’re ordinary.
I love you more when you casually smile into oblivion.
I love you more when you stare off somewhere.
I feel my stomach clenching when I watch your hair fall in the middle of talking
The mountain rise of my chest when you put on your sweater before you leave is just irrational
I love you more when we’re alone
When we’re barely trying and its just, comfortable.
Calm and final.
Right and simple.
I lose it a little whenever your hands move while you talk
How you almost touch the left side of your jaw every time you’re excited about something.
When you play with the screen saver on your phone, I know someone’s getting into a subject you’re avoiding
I watch your movements.
I learn their language.
I translate every look,
every sigh,
every laugh.
I memorise the shape of your neck when you turn around to talk to someone
I take a mental image whenever you fuss around with your legs like they don’t belong to you.
And when you silently stare at me and smile, I’m hypnotised.
I love you more when you’re ordinary.
And I’m giving up on trying not to notice all your inches.
In the hope
That maybe one day
You’ll notice mine.
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