the mental journey of a recovering egomaniac


I sit so patiently
Drenched in the idea of what you want me to be
I am patient
Waiting for my turn
Like I deserve a turn …
Like I am worth nothing more than a waiting list.
I shouted a million times
I’m ready now.
Come get me.
I think I can share you now.

Like you’d even hear me?

My mind needs a break.
It’s so tired from all this strain.
But this was a game already won.
And I wasn’t even playing.
Say goodbye
as I dissect away my life.
Say goodbye
And do not apologize.
This was a game already won.
I just didn’t know it at the time.
Maybe I wish we could stay here
Where its filled with possibilities and wonderful maybes.

But maybe,

I fear,
Your time has come to an end here.
The worst things in life come free to us
And I still can’t figure out which one of us was the first to sell out.
It happened
I’m ready now too.
But for something different.
Something bigger.
Some thing/one that will see more than the waiting list in me
Because my sweet
I know I’m a priority.
Too bad you didn’t when you should.
Now you’re ready?
I’m afraid its too cold outside to melt away all these walls you built in me.
You’re stuck in a daydream of our creation.
I’ll always be your guilty pleasure.
That’s how I’ll haunt you.
That’s how I’ll feed on you
Little by little
Until all that remains in you
Are the hopes of one day
Shattering away the ego that shut you out of me.
As for what happens next?
Its still too cold outside for me to wait for you alone.

So I won’t wait.

Enjoy sharing me like I shared you.
Me and my ego seem to be ready now.

8 thoughts on “the mental journey of a recovering egomaniac

  1. Hello there I am so excited I found your web site, I really found you by accident, while I was researching on Digg for something else, Regardless I am here now and would just like to say thanks for a fantastic post and a all round entertaining blog (I also love the theme/design), I donít have time to look over it all at the moment but I have bookmarked it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the excellent work.

    • with pleasure. thank you for a comment that made my thoughts seem like they’re worth something. this really made it all worth it. i’d love any feedback you can give whenever you get around to reading.

  2. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point. You definitely know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on just posting videos to your site when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?

    • thats the sweetest thing ever, i’ll definitely always right more. it’s how i’m able to really breathe. question though, what video are you referring to?

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